refuse a toast only to drink a forfeit; reject good advice and accept compulsion
Meanings
1 sense · 3 examplesidiom
to refuse a polite offer or gentle persuasion, only to be forced to submit to harsh measures; not to know what's good for oneself
derogatoryOriginating from drinking customs where refusing a toast (敬酒) results in having to drink a penalty cup (罚酒). Figuratively describes someone who ignores good advice or kind offers and only complies when threatened or forced. Often carries a derogatory tone toward the stubborn person, though can be used neutrally to describe the situation.
I advised him kindly out of goodwill, but he wouldn't listen—he simply doesn't know what's good for him.
The boss has already given him enough face; if he refuses this courtesy and forces us to take action, he can't blame us for being impolite.
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The police are advising the suspect to surrender; he'd better not force them to take harsher measures.